Saturday, March 14, 2015
#TheDespicableHumanRace : The Upside Of The Death Of All Humans
The New York Times of 3/13/15 reports:
“Like more than 1,450 other sea lions that have washed up on California beaches this year, in what animal experts call a growing crisis for the animal, this 8-month-old pup was starving, stranded and hundreds of miles from a mother who still needed to nurse him and teach him to hunt and feed. Ribs jutted from his velveteen coat . . .[it] was ragged with unsteady breathing.
It was put into a kennel with another pup so that they could keep each other warm. For the moment the two curled up together like a pair of brown socks. However, veterinary workers decided that both pups were too starved and sick and had to be put down.”
The article states that there is a “suspicion” that unusually warm waters in the Pacific are driving food away causing the horrible death and suffering of helpless animals. A “suspicion?,” #Bullshit. The fact is that, during that last 16 years, the atmosphere has warmed and the oceans have warmed even more strongly than before.
[If you move your lips when you read or are holding a #DroolCup just skip this paragraph.) Now, for the willfully ignorant, mostly slope-headed primitives of the GOP (Groping Old Pricks). The oceans are indeed warming due to climate change. As most democrats, all left-wing radicals and other thinking/feeling folks know, Global warming is primarily a problem of too much carbon dioxide (CO2) in the atmosphere—which acts as a blanket, trapping heat and warming the planet which warms the oceans and alters the availability of food for the sea lion pups and starves them to death.
But hey, what about those 20 percent or more of the child population in 37 states and D.C. that live in food-insecure households (meaning that millions go to bed hungry at night? Well, says America, f*ck them! Why don’t they get a friggin job and why didn’t they choose richer parents before being born into this land of equal opportunity for all?
Yet, show those starving seal pups and doggies with soulful eyes on TV and you’ll get sympathy and financial contributions. Show hungry children at home in the evening without food because their only meals come in the daytime from public schools. and America will say they should eat the leftovers and question whether these kids are wasting food at school. Tea Party rural Southerners, from the land of the bole weevil, grits, and horsecheiße, will say that the “Gob mint” is not authorized by the slavery-condoning U.S. Constitution to feed famished children. (The Enumeration Clause (Article I, Section 2, and Clause 3) counted a black slave as three-fifths of a person for purposes of congressional apportionment.)
Since humans carry on with business as usual and cannot cope with the actual horrors of overpopulation, environmental destruction and climate change, the human race will be extinct within the next hundred years.
Happily, Fundamentalist Christians who revel in “End Times,” crazy Islamists, people like Vladimir Putin, and Kim Jung Ill, haters of LGBT’people, people like Bobby Petrino and Ray Rice, the heads of the NSA, drone operators, climate change de traders in ivory, Big Oil executives and frackers Scientologists, coal mine operators, pimps, War On Drugs advocates, DEA agents, U.S. and European Neo-Nazis, followers of Ayn Rand, Executives of the NCAA, Racist Fraternity Kids, and most politicians will have agonizing deaths, like those seal pups, due to food and water deprivation.
There’s also other good news: With the death of all predatory, parasitic humans the planet will regenerate. Of course by 2100 all animal habitats, sea life, coral reefs, will be mostly gone but scientists say they might well come back.
But there won’t be any puppy seals or doggies with soulful eyes and no humans to see or remember them.